Sunday, January 3, 2010

A few years ago, when I was contemplating becoming a pastor, I definitely felt God calling me to this path, as I had much earlier in my life. But when it had happened years earlier, with the help of others I was able to talk myself out of it. And I was about to do it again. You see, in my own eyes, I had missed my chance. I was the person least likely to succeed or to actually be used by God to create a greater good. Though I was now walking with the Lord again, I’d had, not so many years ago, what I call my 7-year wilderness experience, which started with a divorce from my wife of 17 years. This led to a life of drinking, drugs, wild parties, lots of women--oh, and did I mention drugs and drinking, lots of drinking. So, in my brain and in my way of thinking, God was surely making a mistake--a big one. It was okay for me to work behind the scenes doing sound, working in a warehouse, something like that--being involved in ministry but not actually being a minister and doing ministry. Surely there was someone better for the job. Then I came across a scripture: Proverbs 24:16 says, “Though a righteous man falls seven times, he arises again, but the wicked are brought down by calamity.”

When I first looked at this passage, my interest was piqued. Not that I considered myself a righteous man, because I sure had fallen a lot. So I had to ask the question, “What is a righteous man?” The Bible says that Abraham’s faith was credited to him as righteousness. Noah was said to have righteousness that comes by faith. Moses talked with God on regular basis, led Israel to freedom, and parted the Red Sea; and David was considered a man after God’s own heart. How more righteous can you get than that? The thing I realized is that all these heroes of the Bible were considered righteous, but they all had failure in their lives. Abraham tried to pass his wife off as his sister, Noah had the whole getting drunk and getting naked thing, Moses was a murderer and a coward, and then there’s David, who had an affair with Bathsheba and then knocked off her old man. And these are just a few of the stories.

As I looked in the Word at the righteous men and women of our faith, even I could see that they weren’t without failure. They all had, in one way or another, screwed up. What made them different is that they, in one way or another, woke up--came to their senses (a lot of the time with a lot of help from God). They admitted they were wrong and that they had fallen. They said, as David did in Psalm 31:1, “Deliver me in your righteousness.” In other words, they weren’t righteous because they were all that and a bag of chips. It was because they allowed God the Father, Creator of the universe, to pick them up and fix them with His righteousness, not theirs. And they went on to do mighty works because of their faith.

So I started to realize that there was hope for me after all. You see, I have fallen a lot in my life. In fact, I’m sure there are people who are shocked that I’m a pastor and that finally, after all these years, I have surrendered into full-time ministry. I’m not doing this in my own righteousness but by the grace of my Lord Jesus Christ, who has ordained me to preach the Good News to the poor, lost, and wounded--to the ones that society has given up on--to help them get back up and not let calamity keep them down. So in these blogs as well as in my life, I’m not going to witness about how good I am but that I have fallen over and over and the Lord has picked me back up. I’m going to tell the story of His mercy and of restored hope.

The reason this blog is called The Word According to Bubba is that, on the streets, I’m known as Pastor Bubba, and these writings will be insights and stories about how I’ve learned (and am still learning) to get back up and walk in the Lord’s righteousness. I spent years as a wicked man, letting calamity keep me down, and now by the grace and the blood of Jesus my path has become righteous. And it’s my job now to show those who think like I once did (that they have done too much wrong, that God has given up on them, and that there is no place in God’s plan for them) that there’s a way out. With Jesus leading the way, I want to expose the lies and show the calamity-stricken the path to righteousness. If while reading this you realize you’re one of those people, and you think surely God can’t use you, then think again. Through the mercy and blood of Jesus, get up and start walking the path God has called you to. Walk that walk that you were supposed to walk all along.

Pastor Bubba (Kenny York)

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